Step Two for an Extraordinary Life: Be Grateful
Our family likes to mix it up at meal time. Sometimes we offer a traditional grace, one of the two prayers my husband and I grew up with. Sometimes we get our Von Trapp on and sing “Johnny Appleseed” (Oh, the Lord is good to me, and so I thank the Lord…). At other times we recite the Philmont (boy scout camp in New Mexico) Grace. But our favorite is to go around the table and offer one thing we are thankful for in our day, something for which we are grateful.
Gratitude seems to be implied; of course we are grateful for the roof over our heads, clean, running water and a well-stocked pantry. But unless we really give our attention to our blessings, we are missing a key element to living an extraordinary life. To focus explicitly on what we are grateful for…to say it, to meditate on it…we reap amazing benefits. According to a yet-unpublished book, one way to live a happier life is to practice gratitude:
“Practicing grateful thinking leads to savoring of life’s positive experiences…It has also been shown to help people cope with stress and trauma and encourages active coping. Expressions of gratitude encourage moral behavior with grateful people being more likely to help others. Appreciating the value of your friends through gratitude strengthens social bonds and helps us to nurture relationships.”
Practicing gratitude truly leads to an extraordinary life.
What’s more is it is impossible to feel grateful and hold on to negative emotions at the same time. When we feel gratitude, we cannot be angry, judgmental or vengeful. So focusing on our gifts and blessings can snuff out the negative feelings we harbor; gratitude is good medicine.
Find the little things to be grateful for. How important that advice is. Our day at school or work could be going to pot, or the van may have slid perilously close to a rocky ditch (um, yeah….), but finding the silver-lining (No one was hurt!) or the little gems (a neighbor offering his truck so I could get to an appointment) in even the most frustrating of days can help us be happier and live life well. Some of my recent favorite little things:
a multi-point buck standing snow-covered alongside (and not in!) a slippery stretch of road
a stranger offering to take the large cardboard boxes I was recycling, so I wouldn’t have to break them down
a face-to-face apology from the gentleman who took my parking place at a local coffee shop
So many of the tangibles, gestures and instances in our lives we are little miracles. We are surrounded by them! I love this realization. I love being able to share the gratitude for these seemingly small turns in our day with my kids. I hope by doing so I’m not only teaching them to be grateful but to experience gratitude as the beauty of life. I’ll leave you with one final example:
It was 5:30 the evening of the super moon and my daughter and I were heading home after her gymnastics class. It was just before dusk, the sun grazing the peaks of the San Juan mountains, a gorgeous time of day when the light in the sky starts to pale and everything natural starts to glow. “D” and I were traveling along a county road outside of town, with range land and her inhabitants to our right. Rising over the intense glow of golds, sparse greens and spotlighted cattle and horses was the large orange-red orb of the super moon. “D” and I marveled over the once-in-a-lifetime sky show, and I explained what a super moon was, and what a blue moon was, and that the next morning the moon would be eclipsed. My daughter observed the irony that the blue moon was actually not at all blue, and we laughed at the confusion. As we descended into the valley, and the star of our show disappeared behind a jagged mountain peak, my daughter exclaimed, giggling at her own wit:
“Tonight there will be an eclipse of a super-blue moon!” (Even though it was red-orange…)
That evening, I was not only grateful for the privilege of witnessing this astronomical event: I felt intense gratitude for getting to share it with my daughter. The miracle within the miracle, the beauty of life’s little moments.
…and the precious beauty of life’s little ones. Happy 13th Birthday to two of our biggest miracles! They seem to be grateful for each other at this particular moment…
