Fairness in Gift-Giving
It’s that time of year. The time of year many of us buy the more presents than for any other occasion.
Christmas is almost here.
I used to worry about lopsided Christmas spending on my kids, especially the year my son wanted a lego set and his twin brother wanted a simple plastic lap desk he saw at a craft store. It didn’t take long to realize cost mattered little to my kids but value did; they were elated to receive the coveted items picked from their wish list. Once I shifted my thinking, gift-giving became more enjoyable but the challenges of keeping things even-Steven didn’t completely go away. Two of my kids want everything, so choosing gifts for them is pretty easy, their enumerated wishes longer than Santa’s “good” list. My younger son, however, is tough. I grasp at the fleeting mention of headphones or bacon-flavored popcorn in order to find something to wrap up and put under the tree for him.
While I don’t necessarily track cost when gift-buying, gift count is definitely important, something kids rate highly in the fairness department. BrightHorizons.com gives some straightforward advice on balancing the bounty of Christmas cheer:
♠Keep tabs on the gift count. I’m finally getting meticulous about putting this advice into play. My husband and I set a limit on how many gifts we plan to wrap up for each of our kids. Then as the treasures arrive on our doorstep I write them down on (what I hope is) a well-hidden list. Hopefully this will keep me from panicking at at the 11th hour that we are down one present for one of our kids.
♠If the count is lopsided. Save the extra for birthdays or simply save some dough and return. Or maybe gift the items to other family members or friends. Another idea is to make a present a family one…which is especially easy if it’s a game or movie. Sometimes if I have smaller, similar items for one of my kids I bundle them and wrap as one gift.
♠If the gift is money, special circumstances apply. Bankrate.com recommends that the amount be adjusted for inflation (use usinflationcalculator.com for an annual adjustment) and that the gifts end at a pre-determined age.
Even though the context applies to older children who have flown the coop, theminimalistmom.com says it well:
Fair is not equal.
It does hold true for kids who wish and hope at Christmastime. Fair is giving something our kids put on that wish list, knowing they will love it, whether it matches dollar-for-dollar what his sibling receives under the tree. This is the true spirit of gift-giving.